Cheryl Cole
Life in the fast lane.
If ever proof was needed that celebrities live in their own little world, surely the latest relationship ups and downs of some of our stars is it.
“Overnight” sensations, 15 minutes of fame – celebrity life is fast paced and often vastly at odds with normality, where people struggle for years to achieve their dreams. Or more often, just struggle along and make do.
But while that might have its positives – hurtling from obscurity to the giddy heights of the bright lights – what goes up must come down.
In an instant, the golden girl or boy can find themselves out of favour or even with their whole enviously wonderful life reduced to tatters.
Pitfalls
So do they do anything to guard against the pitfalls of celebrity status, to ensure they stay secure in their privileged position? Um, that would be a no.
Just as they can shoot to stardom, they can plunge into self-destruct mode at the drop of a hat.
Take our celebrity couples. The marketability of two stars united can be formidable, a pairing made in tabloid heaven.
But if and when it all goes wrong, do our not-so happy couple go their separate ways with a hefty dose of once-bitten-twice-shy? Also a no.
In the real world when a serious relationship ends, it’s messy and painful and those affected can take a long time to heal. No so in Celeb-Land.
Take a look at front-page faves, Katie Price and Peter Andre. Their initial pairing up, fresh out of the reality show jungle, seemed like an unmistakeable quest for yet more publicity. Fast forward and they’re proving the doubters wrong, married with kids and looking rock solid. Zip forward again and it’s all gone wrong.
But so far, so normal. These things happpen and perhaps it’s reassuring to know celebrities with their seemingly perfect lives aren’t immune to the sufferings of we mere mortals.
Baggage
However, while we would gather up our newly acquired baggage of a failed relationship – all the more complex if marriage and children are involved – and nurse a broken heart for a considerable length of time, perhaps taking years to acquire the necessary trust in another human being to give relationships another chance, not so our celeb counterparts.
Oh no, they rattle through the grief and anger stages hell for leather and before you know it, they’re on to the next “meaningful” pairing.
Mere months after their divorce, Katie Price is already on her next husband and talking about more children. Peter Andre seemed to think he was entitled to sainthood status after declaring quite vehemently that he’d be staying celibate until after his divorce – turns out the ink was barely dry until he was getting intimately acquainted with a blonde who “cared” so much about him, she spilled her guts to the first tabloid to show willing. Such betrayal from someone he obviously shared such a “meaningful” connection with, say it ain’t so!
No reason to judge though, what two consenting single adults do where and when is their own business – but wouldn’t it be refreshing to see celebs get smart about it? Gee, hopping into bed with the first cash-hungry wannabe hoping for some reflected glory didn’t work out so well, huh? Lesson for the future, no? Uh, you’d think.
But no, celebs seem happy to zip through the major landmarks of life at breakneck speed and then wonder why it all went pear-shaped. Who in the real world meets someone, falls in “love”, gets married and has kids in the space of a year or less?
Well, actually – I can think of a few. But it only proves my point. 99 percent of the time, it doesn’t work in the real world – so what hope could such a lifestyle possibly have under the glare of the camera flashes?
It seems though that for all the trappings of celebrity, some of our famous faces are desperate to hold on to the semblances of normality.
Trying to make a failing marriage work rather than jumping on the divorce wagon at the first hurdle may seem commendable – especially in the celebrity world where trading a partner in for a new one seems routine practice – but sometimes you have to wonder who they’re trying to kid.
Take Cheryl Cole for example. The girl’s got everything (well, almost – she could do with finding someone to teach her how to lip-synch) – looks, money, career. Yet for too long she clung on to C’Ashlay Cole – despite tabloid humilation and much advice to the contrary from friends and family.
Now she’s given him the boot – or has she? Apparently she’s considering giving him “fair hearing”, although mentor Simon Cowell may have averted that particularly crisis with a well-timed “Think of yourself, kiddo”.
Only time will tell whether the pop princess will stick to her guns. But in the meantime, maybe Mr Cowell could have a quiet word with Cheryl’s fellow wag, Toni Poole …
Poor Toni’s judgement seems to have gone right out the window. Although at least we can be thankful the girl had the sense not to take her husband’s name – Toni Terry, it just doesn’t have a ring to it. Unfortunately for Toni though, there is a ring involved …
Lifestyle
Married to her childhood sweetheart and serial love-rat, John Terry, Toni’s been blinded by the WAG lifestyle and she ain’t giving it up. She married her man for better or worse and can it get much worse than his numerous affairs – including the classy hook-up with his best friend and team mate’s partner? Ouch.
Hard done by Wayne Bridge is devastated by the betrayal – so much so he’s voluntarily binned his chances of playing for England in the World Cup because he can’t bear to play in the same team as the man responsible for his heartbreak.
So that’s the wronged best friend’s response – what of the equally wronged, already long-suffering, wife?
Lets be fair to Toni, she met and fell for her man before he became a top footballer – so maybe she’s not in it for the lifestyle. Doesn’t that make it worse though? She’s stuck by him through everything and this is her reward? The national shame of having her dirty laundry aired in public?
But maybe she is her own worst enemy. It doesn’t make it right but, while she lets him off the hook time and time again, of course he’ll keep letting her down. But she’s clinging on for grim death when she should be getting the hell out as fast as her Manolo Blahniks will carry her.
Unlike Cheryl though, Toni doesn’t have a career to keep her in the limelight for her own merits. She may not have expected the fame and riches she’s acquired through the husband she calls her “soulmate”, but giving them up now she’s got ‘em doesn’t seem to be an option she’s considering.
What happened to the days when girls dreamed of meeting a handsome doctor? When did footballers become the dream goal – especially when it so rarely works out?
Would you really want to be shackled to Ashley Cole? John Terry? Surely if these two end up back on the market, any girl would have to be insane to take them on – but lets wait and see, somewhere there’s a WAG-in-waiting already bidding her time and making room in her wardrobe for a newly acquired designer shoe collection.
What price happiness, you ask? Start by sending me a Fendi handbag and I’ll let you know when I’m getting close …
